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Saturday, June 13, 2009

Introducing my Family!

Hi! Some of you reading my blog may not know my family very well or at all. So I thought I would take a little time, and "introduce" them to you. I won't go into great depth on each one because I want to post about each one of them in later blog posts. But I will tell you who they are so you can get to know them. I hope you enjoy!

Okay, so here they are:
Gregg Forrest Bullington (my dad)
Carla Faye Bullington (my sister)- 18
Jared Bill Bullington (my brother)-16
Mandy Anne Bullington (my sister)-14
Maria Rose Bullington (my sister)-12
James Greg Bullington (my brother)-9

I am the oldest out of us kids. I was born in 1988 and I am 21 years old. Carla is the second oldest, she was born in 1991. There are three years between us. Then comes Jared, he is the oldest son and the third born. He was born in 1993. Then there is Mandy, the fourth child, and she was born in 1995. Maria Rose is the youngest daughter and fifth child, and she was born in 1997. Last but not least is James Greg. He is the last child born, and he was born in 2000.

So that's a quick look at my family. Later on I will do separate posts about each one of them so you can get to know them better. But for now this is all you get. lol There are also some pictures below so you can put faces to names. Thanks for reading, and I hope you have a wonderful day!
God Bless,
Paige

This is the family (without me) on Easter/2009

Gregg Bullington-the dad

Gregg Bullington-the dad

Gregg Bullington-the dad

Carla Faye Bullington

Carla Faye Bullington

Carla Faye Bullington

Jared Bill Bullington

Jared Bill Bullington

Jared Bill Bullington

Mandy Anne Bullington

Mandy Anne Bullington

Mandy Anne Bullington

Maria Rose Bullington

Maria Rose Bullington

Maria Rose Bullington

James Greg Bullington

James Greg Bullington

James Greg Bullington

My wonderul Mama, Miriam!

Hello once again! Today I want to share with you about my wonderful Mama. I have been having such a heavy heart lately from missing her so much, and I thought that I should tell you how wonderful she was. So here goes...

Her name is Miriam Anne Bullington, and she was the best mother you could ever, ever ask for. She dedicated her life to her children for her family was most important second to God. She never pursued a career, she never had a lot of money, and she did it all for her family. But I can tell you she was rich with love for her family. She wanted as many children as she could have, and ended up having six children here on earth and five children in Heaven. In the last two years of her life I know she survived for her family for that was the only thing on earth worth living for.

She was most definitely the Proverbs 31 woman though she would have been too modest to say that. She lived her life striving to please the Lord. She took the best care of us, and we all knew we were going to be okay with Mama there. She cooked everything homemade, sewed most of our clothes, home schooled all her children, and she did it all with a smile on her face. Whatever she did she tried to the best of her ability to make it the best for us.

She was one of my very best friends, and I could talk to her about most anything. I went to her with my troubled heart so many times, and she was always there to comfort me and give me wonderful advice that I cherish to this day. You never realize the wonderful advice until you are grown, and now I cannot tell her how wonderful she was. She always had time for each of her children, and would listen to each of us individually.

I would always tell her about my dreams about my future, and how I wanted her to be there for everything. I wanted her to help with my wedding, even wanted her to make my wedding dress. I wanted her to be there when I had my own children. I wanted her in my future, and wanted us to experience each chapter of life together. But God had other plans that to this day I don't understand, and I don't think I ever will. It cannot be reasoned in my mind that it was the right time to take her when she still had young children for her to raise. But I guess that's why I am not God. I believe that God has a reason for everything, and I am not trying to say that God doesn't know what He is doing. I am just saying I do not understand why. Why? That is a word I have so many times over the past two years, but I don't think I will have an answer to that question until I reach Heaven. There is a song called "Homesick" by Mercy Me, and there is a phrase in that song that fits perfectly right here.
"Help me Lord because I don't understand your ways. The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know. But even if You showed me, the hurt would be the same."
So even if I knew why my heart would still ache for her. So I am trying my very best to not ask God why, but to just look forward to the day when I can see her again. It seems so far away, but God said life is just a vapor. So I must patiently wait.

Maybe some of you do not know what happened to my Mama. In 2004 she was diagnosed with Lymphoma which is cancer. It was stage four which is the last stage of cancer. The doctors said she was so close to dying when they found the cancer, but God wasn't done with her just yet. She fought two long hard years, and never gave up. She told me that she was fighting for her family. The pain she went through was horrible, and I think if she had not had her family her will to live wouldn't have be so strong. But she did have her family so she fought with all her might. She never went into remission, and in the end of second year the cancer stopped responding to treatments. The doctors pretty much sent her home to die. Mama then tried the natural route, but it was just too late. On September 13, 2006 she left us and went to be with her Father.

Now it's been two years since she has been gone. I never thought I could go without her, that I could live without her. I have but a lot of it has been hell to go through. As time passes by I am sure many people have gotten over it, but not her family. She was such a huge part of my life, for eighteen years she raised me, and I just cannot get "over" it. I don't think I ever will. She was my Mama for goodness sake, and if someone can just "get over it" I would seriously think that person has no heart at all. I know Mama is in a better place, much better than here on earth. She is perfect now, and is in no more pain. She gets to be able to be with her other children now, and I am thankful she is in no more pain. I just miss her terribly, more than anyone could ever know. I have heard it all about how I will get to see her one day, about how time heals, about how now we just need to let her go and think about the memories. All those things are true, but none can ease the pain. Nothing will ever make the pain go away because she is GONE. And there's nothing I can do about it. I can never talk to her again, can never hear her voice, can never ask for advice, she will never be in my future. All the dreams I had of sharing my future with my Mama are GONE. That is why I hurt. And anything people say will never make that hurt go away.

I guess I just want to say that I love my Mama with all of my heart and always will. I never realized just how much she was apart of my life, and now I can't say thank you. I cannot wait to get to Heaven! I imagine when I walk through the pearly gates she will be the first person I see. I cannot wait for that long embrace when I get to hold her again. When I get to hear that sweet, beautiful voice again. Oh, how that will be glory! I will never be able to say how wonderful she was because I don't think there are enough words in the English language to be able to do that. But trust me when I say she was the BEST! I am so thankful God chose me to be the daughter of the best Mama in the world.

Lastly, I want to share a song with you that I cling to. It helps me when I am feeling down, helps me when I think I just can't go on anymore. It reminds me that one day I will get to be with Mama again, and to just hang on a little longer here on earth. I have already shared a phrase from that song with you. I hope it blesses you as much as it blesses me. Read the words, and listen to it on my play list that is here on my blog. I guarantee it will touch your heart!

"HOMESICK" By Mercy Me


"You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times. And at least a thousand times I have rejoiced for you. But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry, Is how long must I wait for you.

I close my eyes, and I see your face. If homes where my heart is then I am out of place. Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow. I've never been more homesick than now.

Help me Lord because I don't understand your ways. The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know. But even if you showed me the hurt would be the same. Cause I am still here so far away from home.

I close my eyes, and I see you face. If homes where my heart it the I am out of place. Lord, won't you give me strength to make through somehow. I've never been more homesick than now.

In Christ there are no goodbyes. And in Christ there is no end. So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have. To see you again. To see you again."

I LOVE you Mama, and I cannot wait to see you again!
Love Your Daughter,
Paige

~Below are pictures of Mama~

Mama and me

Mama and me

Mama and me

Mama and me

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Miriam Anne Bullington (Mama)

Mama, Daddy, me, Carla, and Jared

Mama, me, Carla, Jared, Mandy, Maria Rose, and James Greg

Mama, me, Carla,and Jared

Mama, me, and Carla

Mama, me, and Carla

Mama and Mandy

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Carla is a Senior!

Hi! Here I am once again bringing you exciting news. Last time I posted about my youngest sister, Maria Rose. But this time I am posting about my younger oldest sister, Carla. This year she is a senior, and she will be graduating soon. I am so excited for her, and I couldn't wait to share with you all this great news.

Carla is the second oldest child in our family. Carla and I are three years apart. Ever since she was born, Carla and I have been best friends. Of course we had our sisterly arguments at times, but I would have died for Carla. She was the one person who knew almost everything about me, and we were inseparable. I have never been as close to someone as I have been with Carla (apart from my mama). When we were little girls you would have never caught us apart. We played together, shared a room all our lives, and always helped each other out. She has always been my dearest friend, and always will be. I have so many good memories of Carla and me, and it makes my heart joyful remembering all of those good times. We stuck with each other through the thick and thin.

When I moved away from home when I turned eighteen, we became slightly distant for the first time in our lives. Things were said, different opinions were made, and hearts grew distant. We neither understood what we each needed to do. Times were very hard for both of us, and decisions were made. I wish I could say that everything turned out perfectly, but things didn't go that way. I don't regret the choice I made, I just wish I had done it in different timing and a different way. With all the stress I was carrying and things I wanted to do with my life, I couldn't see clearly. I made choices that many people including Carla could not understand. I don't blame them that they didn't understand, but I did want them to believe in me. But such wasn't the case so Carla and I disagreed and we moved on with our lives. I wish I could go back and redo all of what happened; for our inseparable sisterhood has never returned. Carla and I are still great friends, but we each have our own lives. I live farther away now so it's hard to see Carla as much as I would like to. But she is always in my heart! I will never forget the wonderful childhood and sisterhood we had, those were the best days of my life. She will always be my best friend no matter what happens!

Carla has become a beautiful, mature, Godly, kind spirited woman. She has taken what life has thrown her way, and dealt with it to the best of her ability. She helps so many people, always has a kind word to say to anyone, and greets each day praising her King. She is someone who I greatly admire and love! I am very blessed to call her my sister. I wish I could be at least half of what she is. She has such amazing strength that only God can give. She is strong for herself and for those around her. She has been my source of strength many, many times. She truly is the Proverbs 31 woman, and whoever God has picked out for her to marry will be truly blessed to have her as his wife. Although he better not hurt her in any way or my fury will be released. :)

As I sit here writing this my mind goes drifts back to the past, and tears come to my eyes thinking about our wonderful friendship. I now wish I could go back and relish those days and not take for granted anything. Carla and I have one thing in common that I wish would have never happened. We both lost our loving Mama. Which I guess I shouldn't say lost but rather passed her on to her Father. She is Heaven, and I am so glad she isn't in pain anymore. But I miss her so much, more than I could ever express in words. She was our Mama, our source of strength, the one who made everything okay. Even though life at times were hard, we knew we were going to be okay with Mama being there. Since she has gone, me and I am sure my siblings have felt lost without her. There will never be a woman like her, and she will always be my Mama. I can see Carla becoming like her. She has the same humble, kind spirit as Mama had. I am so grateful that Mama still lives on in each of us, and she will always be in our hearts.

In conclusion I just want to say that I admire Carla for all she is and what she has done. She has been able to do things I could never do, and I admire that so much. She is the greatest friend and sister in the world, and I love her so much! I LOVE you Carla!!!

Paige

--Below are Carla's senior pictures--

























Wednesday, June 10, 2009

My sister's 12th Birthday!

Hello my friends of the blogging world. :) Today I have exciting news, and I thought I would share it with everyone. My youngest sister, Maria Rose had a birthday today. Well, technically yesterday since I am writing this past midnight, but it still feels like today. :) Anyway, her birthday is June 10Th, and she turned 12 years old. My baby sissy is growing up so fast. I can't believe next year she will be a teenager. That just blows me away. All of my siblings are growing up and becoming who they are, and it's so incredible to be able to watch that happen. I don't get to see them as much as I would like to be it I live three and a half hours away, but it's always such a joy to see them when I do go visit. I am trying to work out at least one if not two of my sisters can come visit me sometime soon. Since school is out they are free to travel, and stay with their big sissy. I cannot wait! :D I have lots of things planned for us, and I know we will have a great time. My sisters are my best friends (and so is Jeremiah lol), and I love to spend time with them.
Anyway, to get back to Maria Rose's birthday. She did not have her party today, but is going to have it Sunday when her friends can come over. I called her today to wish her a happy birthday, and she loved it. I was the first person to call her, and make her day. :) She told me about all the gifts she had gotten, and she is just so adorable. I remember the day she was born. My siblings and I were over at my grandparent's house waiting for "the" phone call to let us know she was here. The phone must have rang a hundred times or so it seemed that day. Finally, my dad called in the afternoon announcing that Maria Rose was here. We all got ready, and went to the hospital to greet our new little sister into the world.
She has always been a kind spirited, independent, loving little girl. She has the cutest smile, and she will just giggle all the time. :)
Her name was the first name Mama decided to call her by her first and middle name. She wanted everyone to call her Maria Rose although many people didn't. Mama gave her a nickname, Rosebud. She used to say, "she is my little Rosebud". Now people who know Maria Rose well just shorten it to Rose most of the time.
Well, I should go now, but I just wanted to let you know what a special day this is. (Oh also exactly 3 years since my graduation if any of you wanted to know lol). She is our little Rosebud, and always will be. I love you Maria Rose, and I hope you had the best birthday ever. Can't wait to see you! Love you!!!

Paige




This is Maria Rose on Easter of 2009




Maria Rose on Easter of 2009



Here are all three of my sisters. From left to right are-
Mandy, Maria Rose, and Carla on Easter of 2009.



From left to right-
Mandy, Laurel (my dad's wife), Maria Rose and Carla on Easter of 2009.



Here is Maria Rose with a couple of her friends from church on Easter 2009. Maria Rose is the one in the middle.